Woman of Influence
How God used me to unknowingly change a life
I rarely think of myself as a woman of influence. I can barely get my children to listen to me, much less someone not threatened with losing TV privileges. Don’t get me wrong—I’m opinionated, I’m passionate, I’m successful at making my voice heard. But true influence, the kind that motivates people, creates change, and inspires others—well, I just don’t have that. Or so I thought.
Last July, I attended a staff reunion at the Bible camp where I worked during my college summers. I spent six summers there, serving in various roles—cabin counselor, lead counselor, program coordinator—and I loved every second of it. At the reunion, I had a great time catching up with co-workers I hadn’t seen in 20 years, campers I hadn’t seen since they were kids, and staffers I hadn’t seen since I was a kid. We traded the kinds of stories that only come about by throwing 50 college students into the woods for a summer—crushes and pranks and endless silliness. I often felt those years were indulgent. I wish I could say I’d had some noble desire to impact kids for Christ at camp, but, honestly, I was in it mostly for the fun.
The reunion’s keynote speaker was one of my former campers, Heather, who’s since become one of my dearest friends. I was her cabin counselor my first summer on staff. I was 19, and she was 11. Now she’s the junior high youth pastor at a huge church in Minnesota. She’s been ministering to more than 500 students each week for a decade. Now that’s a woman of influence!
Heather began her speech talking about what the camp had meant to her as a girl. Then she started talking about me. She told how I’d shown her so much love and acceptance back then that my care had changed how she felt about herself. She told the crowd she’d come to camp feeling her huge personality, tomboy athleticism, and enthusiasm for life weren’t really acceptable, but I’d clearly loved all of those aspects of her (and I had—she was quite a kid!). She said I changed her life. Because of me, she said, she knew she wanted to impact others as I’d impacted her. Now I certainly can’t take credit for the extraordinary woman Heather is today, but I clearly had an influence on her life at a crucial time.
Remember, however: I was 19. I was clueless. I was concerned far more about catching the eye of the cute camp wrangler than about inspiring all my campers with my peerless counseling style. But God used me to influence Heather. Despite my immaturity, my lack of experience mentoring 11-year-old girls, and my crush on the wrangler, God was actively involved in my relationship with Heather. She came with struggles that, until five months ago, I hadn’t known she’d had. I came with struggles of my own. But God brought our circumstances together to forge a life-changing experience for a girl God created to accomplish great things.
And more than 20 years later, at that camp reunion, God forged a life-changing experience for me as well. As I’ve thought about Heather’s words, I’ve changed my mind about influence. It doesn’t necessarily come because you’ve studied the best ways to lead. It doesn’t emerge because you have the best ideas or the perfect credentials. Influence happens when you connect with other people. It occurs when you see them for who they are and celebrate all God made them to be. It transpires when you’re honest and authentic with each other.
Blessings,
Posted at 8:20 AM on November 21, 2007.
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yes, Lord, thank You for all those who have influenced us, towards You Lord. this includes you , carla, thru this article. thanks! and above all else LOrd, help us to celebrate all who cross our paths, help us to be honest and authentic with one another.
Posted by: bonnie on November 22, 2007
Thank you for this article, Carla! As someone who is still quite young, but doing lots of church work (preaching, leading a small group and so on), I've often wondered if I have any positive impact on people whatsoever - or if I'm perhaps far too young for them to take me seriously at all.
Your story was an encouragement and a reminder that God can use me even when I don't think I'm very 'useful' myself.
Posted by: Stefanie on November 23, 2007
We try so hard to be influential, to say and do the right things, and we don't have to try at all. God handles it for us! It would remove so much stress if we could just remember that...
Posted by: Beth on November 24, 2007
It is wonderful how God encourages us in our faith. I often feel I have not done enough to reach others for Christ in spreading the good news and then God will remind me of past people that I have reached out to and that encourages me to be who i am in Christ and not try and be like others I admire. Jesus is our example. Just as you accepted this young girl for who she was so Jesus wants us to just care and love those he puts across our path. He will do the rest as you saw happen in this young woman's life. What a blessing to know that God uses us to touch people with His love! Sharon South Africa
Posted by: Sharon on November 25, 2007
Thanks for sharing that. I'm just starting to lead a group of young girls and its a great reminder that to influence, all it takes is to love and accept them for who they are, and connect with them. I pray all Christian women in the world become the loving and beautiful women God created them to be. To inspire people through beauty and point them to God.
Posted by: Jo-Hanna Ho on November 25, 2007
Your article is encouraging. The Lord gives me leading roles but I always think a better person should have done it, though I know the Lord does not make a mistake.
Your article encourages me to go on obeying the Lord's appiontments.
Lilian de Silva
Sri Lanka
Posted by: Lilian de Silva on November 25, 2007
I particularly think that I have no influence at all over anybody, coz as it is I am already struggling with some real hard issues in my life. However, I thank God if at some point in my life I have been able to influence somebody positively especially in their walk with Christ.
Thanks for the article. God Bless your work.
Posted by: Lucy on November 26, 2007
Carla-
Thank you for this wonderful article - God is using you in powerful ways! How often I've looked at other women and men who display a quiet wisdom and have ability to inspire others to seek the Lord in all things and wish I could be like them. But through your article and in other ways, God is showing me that just by being who He created me to be and desiring to love others as He loves them, He is shaping me to be a woman of influence in ways I may never realize or come to know. And I know He does this for us all. Praise be to Him!
Posted by: Andrea on November 26, 2007
Isn't it amazing that God can use us when we are so unaware of it? I had a similar experience when I met up with a woman a few years ago, whom I did not recognize. She remembered me and reminded me that I had picked her and another teen up every week to attend prayer meetings and taken them out for coffee sometimes afterwards. Thirty years later and she is married to a Christian and has raised her kids in the Lord. Was I amazed! Not at my own prowess in influencing others, but in the awesome power of God to have used me to help Him change someone's life. Just as amazing was that He allowed me to see some of the 'fruit' from seeds that I had unknowingly planted years before.
Seeing her again made me also realize that it is not only Pastors, Teachers, and people in prominent positions who influence others for God. It's all those who labor in the vineyard of the Master!
Posted by: Susan on November 26, 2007
When I thought God could use me least is when it seems He used me most. My life has been filled with much hardship and pain. I so wanted my life to influence other women for Christ, but over time, I didn't see how that could be possible. I guess I thought I had to do something great. God showed me different.
In one of the worst of the many hardships I've gone through, I ended up homeless. Being homeless, is one thing, but being homeless and in a w/c is another whole ball game. FYI, most homeless shelters are not h/c accessible or equipped. How I got through that time literally was by the grace of God. Never would I thought I could have been of use to anyone during that time. But, in spite of myself, I did have a positive influence on others. Agencies told me that I taught them things about the h/c community and how to better help them find housing as well as avenues to search they had never thought to look.
AFter spending a couple nights in my van, a friend who is legally blind found out and rode on his bike along a busy highway to pay for me to stay in a hotel for 4 nights. After that, someone else picked up a few days and on and on. I didn't know who these people were. Later, though, stories began to filter back to me of people whose lives were changed in a positive manner through what I lived through. Some of these were people who somehow heard of my story through conversations at work or home, etc. They weren't really involved in any way. I was shocked and surprised. In spite of myself, of where and how and what I was living through physically, spiritually, emotionally, God used me to influence others lives. I didn't understand why I had to go through that experience. It about did me in and to be honest it took so much out of me physically, mentally, spiritually I haven't really recovered, yet, like I said in spite of myself, God did make me an influencial woman. I didn't do anything but go through.......and it had to be by God's grace I did that.
Posted by: Dawn on November 30, 2007
Your story was an encouragement and a reminder that God can use me even when I don't think I'm very 'usefThank you for this wonderful article - God is using you in powerful ways! How often I've looked at other women and men who display a quiet wisdom and have ability to inspire others to seek the Lord in all things and wish I could be like them. But through your article and in other ways, God is showing me that just by being who He created me to be and desiring to love others as He loves them, He is shaping me to be a woman of influence in ways I may never realize or come to know. And I know He does this for us all. Praise be to Him!
ul' myself.
Posted by: samuel on April 12, 2008