I can relate to this whole thing. Although my stint with self-induced malnourishment was in high school, I brought an end to my monthly "curse" for about four or five months. The first time I missed a period, I celebrated that fact. It made me feel even more in control (the feeling that fuels such self-induced malnourishment...). But then I started to realize that I was supposed to be growing at this stage in my life. Making my period go away was the worst thing! I started to think, what if my breasts don't fully develop? I don't want to look like a boy. With all of the wonders of womanhood, sometimes the "curse" has a hidden blessing. When I am older and the curse begins to lift on its own - that will be a new season of grace. Thanks and encouragement to Andrea for this down-to-earth, soul nourishing post! :)

I love the title's play on words. :)

I'm reading this thinking, "I have NEVER been underweight, and I've been more than fertile." And I've never been overly fond of PMS. But in my teens and twenties, the whole PMS and period thing was no big deal, with the cycle being relatively short and symptom free. And no, I'm not rubbing it in.

When I hit thirty, everything started to change. Gradually, so I didn't really notice. And I'm no longer bearing children. So this curse has really seemed to be such.

Two things have changed my perspective on the cycle: 1) watching my teenage daughter go through far worse PMS than I do even now 2) realizing that PMS is child's play compared to menopause (I just turned 40 and it's looming). Something to which I never gave a second thought has become a curse.

So I guess I see this from the opposite end. I actually am not looking forward to the end of the curse, even though I now see it as a curse. And I know that the ride is different for every woman.

Sorry - didn't mean to be a party pooper. Just my two cents.

Everything Andrea wrote was true! I actually have mine right now and wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry about the article. I'm not very good with keeping up on what exact days it's coming. Usually, it's that first cramp that let's me know it's a few days away. However, I completely "spaced it" this month and then laughed to my friend when one entered my apartment and saw me crying in my desk chair while watching my favorite television show online. The episode wasn't even all that sad, but there I was . . . balling. Then to make matters worse, I made noddles for myself for lunch, then added three pieces of bread, a handful of M&Ms, and stopped to get french fries after work . . . then, and only then, did it hit that I might be experiencing some pre-period cravings. The next day I wasn't sure whether the pains I was experiencing were cramps or overeating pains. My guess? A little bit of both.

What a poignant article Andrea! I think we've all at some point suffered the demise of "PMSing." I feel sorry for our loved ones and coworkers for those whose PMS is a monthly recurrence of anger, irritability, and moodiness. Thankfully my experiences with PMS irritability is only occasional. For me, my periods are definitely not a curse, but as I'm aging, now 36, I feel very sad and almost depressed when yet one more month of eggs is being shed without fertilization. I want so desperately to be married and to have children, so with each month I'm "reminded" that my dream is still not happening, and right before my very eyes, the very ability to bear children is quickly slipping away--out of my control. I've recently had another fertility set-back too. I was diagnosed with an ovarian tumor and had to have my left ovary and fallopian tube removed, so now I only have one ovary to hopefully (oneday) have children with. So consider it a blessing to be healthy and have all your "parts" and the GIFT of a period. The gift for me now is that I don't have cancer and that God has saved one ovary for the hopeful dream-come-true of children someday!

I used to think like Andrea, but I realized God put this thing in our bodies, for a reason and I dint want a risk having babies after I got married so I decided to look at PMS and MS as a blessing, not a curse.

Never having to suffer with PMS, I never thought much about my cycle. Until recently, as a 44 year women, I now have irregular cycles, with periods that last as many as 8-10 days, only to have it return 2-3 weeks later. I'm currently tracking all my cycles, so I can speak to my doctor about alternatives.

On the other hand, in retrospect, I feel blessed to have such a normal uneventful time as a younger women.

Andrea (& others reading),

O, I have never had PMS, thank you Jesus! My periods as a teen, were heavy and crampy. :( Then they evened out as I got a bit older and was on BC pills. THEN, about 10 years ago they stopped just like they started, suddenly. I was a bit concerned and when I went in for my yearly check up, the doctor said 'o you need to have a period at least every 3 months!' WHY I asked? For your body was the response from this man. Anyway he put me on HRT and then the PMS began! But it didn't just last a few days b4 it was all month long. And the periods were any where from 14 - 21 days in length (although the doc called it break through bleeding, not a 'period'). My husband & I didnt associate it w/the pills -- till later. THEN I told the doc and he couldn't believe it. SO I decided on my own to stop the HRT -- and now I have been period free for 7-years. Again, thank you JESUS! I was 45 years old at the time and have not missed the monthly drama, heavy bleeding, and missed days of work due to this natural process. God knew what I could handle and it was shortly after my periods stopped that my 2 oldest grandkids came to live with us for 3-1/2 years. So, yes He (God) was 'gracious and merciful' to me.

PMS? Oh yes - it had always been bad, but as I grew older, the worse it got. However, I came to resent not the cramps, bloating, (and let's face it!) MESS each month less than my "High A" personality groused at my inability to CONTROL each cycle. My monthlies grew more and more erratic (23 days one month, 35-39 the next, etc.) which made planning for family events lots of fun! No one was happier than I when things began to slow down to an (ahem) trickle, and stop altogether! My femininity is intact, and no more surprises when I stand up quickly!

I sympathize with you. I never considered this time a blessing, in fact, as a young girl, I hated being a girl for the painful time of the month. I did not experience the eating disorder problems as a young person.

After I had children in my late 20's the monthly periods were not a problem. But when I hit my mid-40's I started getting terrible migraines. My doctor would not believe me that they were connected with hormones. Very frustrating.

One day at a Bible study I became very sick and after that a friend there shared a book with me about menopause. In that book I read my exact symptoms and learned about progrestone cream which saved me. My headaches stopped.

I am now 55 and coming to the end of the monthly cycles. This time in my life has been relatively easy. I thank you for your viewpoint of being thankful for the bodies God blessed us with. I have two wonderful boys, who were gifts given to me and my husband by God. Any painful times in my life had brought me closer to my Heavenly Father.

Thanks for the article. Nice to read that I'm not the only "crazy" lady out there. ; )

I don't take comfort or rejoice in my PMS bouts. As I get older, I'm almost 30, my PMS has gotten worse and I'm starting to dread it. Many times I forget to look at the calendar and spend hours crying or full of rage or severe depression and I don't know why. Then the next day it's like "Oh, yeah, I forgot.". I've taken herbal supplements to help aleve (sp) the problem and sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. How I'd love to wake up one morning and not have to go through PMS anymore.

Just last Christmas, after 4 years of a hit or miss period, mine has finally returned to a monthly cycle.

I went 4 to 8 months at a time without menstrating. At first I was happy to be free from worrying about the monthly nuisance, but after years of not having it I began to tire of feeling emotionally dull. I couldn't cry and I rarely felt really happy. All those crazy emotions that make us women were gone. It started to bother me, but I continued to choose a thin body and control over being womanly like the way God made me to be.

I finally snapped out of my selfish, skewed view when I heard stories about women not being able to have babies after being anorexic for years and after I was warned by a doctor about the possibility of cancer.

Like you, Andrea, I finally said 'It's okay to eat! No, it's GOOD to eat!' I wanted to be the woman God intends for me to be - hips, chest, period, and all. I'm also very thankful for the emotions and hormones. I feel as though I can love a little better.

It's good to be a woman.

For those of you who experience debilitating PMS, cramping, heavy bleeding, and menstrual migraines, talk to your doctor about long-term birth control pills. For women with severe symptoms, continuous birth-control is often the answer. And no, it is not harmful to your body--you don't HAVE to have a period every month! (Consider your great-grandmothers--they were either pregnant or nursing for years at a time so they didn't even have very many periods in their entire lifetimes.) And it does not affect fertility. Women usually ovulate within a few days of stopping the pills. Check into the recent research on this topic--it may be just what you need!

I have never thought of my period as a curse. Even when I had debilitating cramps. (They were remedied with surgery for endometriosis, twice.) Even when I went through 6 months of drug induced menopause at 36 for treatment of endometriosis! My poor husband!

My PMS not only shows itself with mood swings, crying spells and total self doubt, but wonderful creativity and artistic ability. I am more sensitive to those in need and am more able to spend time in prayer.

My periods became very heavy and I ended up in the emergency room. Now I have a fibroid. To treat it, all my hopes of any more fertility are over.

I praise God for my beautiful daughter, concieved through IVF after 20 years of marriage.

Everywoman becomes barren. But in God's economy we are all frutiful and spiritual mothers. It doesn't matter about age, fertility, marital status, or PMS. God expects us to be fruitful and multiply spiritually.

Our bodies are a picture of what God wants the church to be. A place where spiritual babes are concieved, nurtured, fed, and launched into maturity to produce more. When we have PMS, we are a picture of a disfunctional church. Think about it.

You are the bride of christ.

Andrea,
I was led by heavenly influence to read this article just minutes before i made a big decision. I was having a terrible case of PMS, but it seems to last for most of the month. as a matter of fact i dont seem to get a break. I started getting worried about my unexplained irritability. i had become the worlds most unpredictable mom and guilt and confussion were my constant companion.No matter how i prayed nad tried to be pleasnt and playful, without warning the moster was awake.
then one statment from my husband unleashed so much anger in me that only finacial constraints stoped me from running away, at least for a while.
the mood swings and tearfulness then the sillies made me wonder about my mental health. But I know its PMS and i am happy for thr reminder.
SO in a few minutes I'll hug my husband so tightly he'll wonder about the strange creature he married!
Thank you andrea.

I was looking forward to menopause from about the age of 13 on. I disliked those periods, but didn't realize how those few days before my period affected my moods until I got overseas. For some reason, our team leader always called team meetings during those few days before my period. Our team meetings in those days were extremely tense, and I wondered why I was always so upset, short-tempered, angry. I mean, the meetings were not always very pleasant, but they didn't call for such a strong reaction as I felt. When I finally clued it, I was able to handle the meetings a whole lot better by telling myself that I was reacting to hormones, and should not react to people or problems based on those hormones.

Menopause caused the same problems, plus a few. But, happily I'm past that now and life is wonderful — no periods and past all the menopause stuff too! Hurrah!

Yes, us women need to use the pms time as a time to slow down and nurture ourselves. When the period is absent, we are all busy running around like a chicken with no head! Very close to the start of the period, we need to slow down and not over work ourselves. This will help in the aid of self-care and an easier (happy?) period. :)

Here goes, I have never had an eating disorder, but my sister struggles with bullemia nervosa and anorexia. I have witnessed her struggle with it for 15 years. Just a inside tip for young girls with this disorder, stop now!!! Get help!!!
For my sister it was no longer about how she looked, but a psycological way to make herself feel better. She is 28 years old with two children and daily battles with food. On the subject though, I was great as a teen and young lady. However, after one miscarrige and two healthy miracles each month things got a little worse. I began not only having PMS, but something my doctor diagnosed with PMDD. Talk about PMS x 4. I did not even want to get out of bed, take a shower, care for my children, others children(I am a daycare provider and a children's ministry director). So as you can see these things can and do effect everyone. I tried a birth control pill called YAZ, but it made my migraines worse so I discontinued the pill. Now I am just trying to find something natural to take that will not interfere with my life. And to comment on the spiretual side of it all, I believe the Bible and God knows what we go through. I am ever turning to him in times of struggle and the PMDD times they are soooo hard, but my God is bigger than PMDD. My God is bigger than an eating disorder. My God is bigger!
Thank you to all of you who commented, it is so wonderful to hear from other christian women on these issues.
God bless you.

Thanks for sharing-like so many I can so relate, though I never had that self-induced skipped periods even though I went through college mal-nutrition.

May I just offer what I finally learned after many years of the 'PMS' emotional lability and resultant fights? It was really pretty simple once it dawned on me-no serious discussions during 'that time' because everything gets blown out of proportion and it's hard to tell what's real and what's hormonal. Reminders to table discussions until the time passes. Self imposed semi-isolation when necessary to keep me from biting loved ones heads off for no reason.

and even with the cycle continuing-those days shall pass.

Starting at age 20 my periods became irregular and then just stopped coming all together. I'm 30 now, and I just found out that for 10 years I had a pituitary tumor that altered my reproductive hormones and stopped me from menstruating. Through God's grace the tumor actually ruptured - I didn't have to have brain surgery to remove it! I’m on medication now to regulate my pituitary gland, and I’m very happy to be getting periods again. The hormone imbalance in my body caused other issues, like weight gain. Because the missed periods had bee misdiagnosed as a problem with my ovaries, I thought I wouldn’t be able to have children. My thoughts about the future have changed dramatically now that I know I can have children of my own. It feels very good to be normal and healthy.

I had a serious problem with PMS a few years ago. My Dr. suggested vitamin B. It worked!! I know take a vitamin supplement called Levity. My mood swings are under control and I feel better during that "time of the month". Vitamin B my not work for everyone, but it has made a difference in my life.

Thank you Andrea for the time you put into this article. I appreciate your honesty. I was so happy you wrote about this topic and want to send this article "Grace Period" to all my girlfriends. You were blunt, funny and serious. I could relate to you so much.

Thank you for addressing PMS. This was really refreshing to hear that Christian women go through this and can be REAL about it. For the past 3 months I have really been struggling with PMS, and have seemed to have all the symptoms to where all I want to do is lay on my couch and watch TV, and not be bothered. To see you address those real emotions was freeing. Thank you once again.

PMS is no excuse for a lack of professionalism at work or for predictable altercations between loved ones. If it's predictable, it's preventable. Spend a little extra time in prayer; pamper yourself; isolate yourself--whatever it takes to display the disciplines of the beautiful woman. Blaming PMS for our inability to deal with people and problems is exactly what gives women a bad reputation in the workplace. Grit your teeth! You're in control.

I have heard all the jokes about PMS but no one knows what it is like until you have experienced it for yourself.

My poor husband finally has caught on that I get irritable and cranky almost every month. I use to think it was ok to just let my PMS have it's way until I started learning about the Fruit of the Spirit in which one of them is self-control.

I have an honest talk with the Holy Spirit every month in which I ask Him to help me through this emotionally trying time.
If I'm in prayer and spending time with God daily then things go so much smoother. I also prewarn my husband by marking it on the calendar.

I do believe that this "curse" as you call it is a reminder to every woman that we are fallen and we need a Savior. I need God to help me through his strength to manage at that time of the month. I cry out to God alot during the week before and after.

God does not want me to live my life based on how I feel but on His word. My PMS has actually driven me closer to God. I guess I don't like how I get at that time and want to be transformed. Only God has the power to help.

I am most grateful that my pms was minor. There were a few times, perhaps more than a few, when it was awful. But I found by accident, that it was the caffeine I was ingesting. Not coffee, but coke, was my downfall. Eliminating caffeine made any symptoms virtually disappear. For other reasons I discovered progesterone like a prior post noted. And now that I am approaching menopause, I don't have the well-known symptoms of that. I really believe that paying attention to the nutrition needs of my body has made a difference.

You are so right that we need to embrace the way God made us. Each so individual. Height, weight, problems, and all. He loves us just the way we are and that is so awesome!

PMS began for me around age 33. Or perhaps it'd been there all along but got much worse at that point. As the years progressed, and it began to affect relationships, I went from doctor to doctor and finally discovered that certain antidepressants can give huge amounts of relief from PMS. I'm well into menopause now - don't worry, ladies, it's a Piece of Cake compared to PMS!!!!! Talk to your doctors about some of the newer antidepressants with which they're having fantastic success over PMS. My 11-year-old daughter has horrible PMS already, and we've seen an incredible amount of relief as she takes 1/2 an antidepressant pill each of the 7 days prior to her cycles. Thank God for medicines which help us!!! I wish for each of you the same help I found.

Thank you for the validity of the PMS experience this article brings to women wanting to live sane and holy lives, as well as the reminder that there is a place to turn and another reason to depend on Him. Sometimes I think I'm going insane, engulfed in a downward spiral of negative thoughts and emotions (not to mention the physical desire), completely forgetting that I'm a few days away from the curse/blessing.

It seems to be both, a curse and a blessing. It's not likely that we would experience it the same way had we been content in the garden...but, it does remind me to celebrate my uniqueness as a woman, and give myself a little grace, whether I ever get to see the good side of it personally or not (child-bearing). Sometimes I wish we were still considered unclean and banished to a tent to lounge and commiserate together...keeping those clueless about our state safe :) But, I guess that wouldn't really solve the problem either.

AM so glad i have someone who identifies with me:My only consolation is in knowing that every day of my PMS is in celebration of my precious womanhood.
I have been so irritable that i couldnt understand my self days later.Over very small issues.
Well God Help me during those times to get a grip over my emotions.
Mary

I loved the artical I am a woman who suffers from pmdd which is premenstral dyphoric disorder and 2 weeks before menstral cycle I suffer from anxiety and depression. I have these unexplainable moods where I am extremely irritable, crying spells for no reason, increased hunger and lathargic. I prayed and asked the lord to remove this illness from me because in the bible the lord states that I come to give you life and give it more abundantly. So I know this is not of God. So God has given me wisdom to embrace the change each month by reading positive affirmations and the bible. I haven't started but I find that I feel better when I exercise and that I write and journal my experiences which lifts the anxiousness and irritability off of me. I was lead to look up the disorder and I found a website that allows for women with pmdd to track their moods each day for 50 days and give to their doctor and in the interim, once you track a complete seven days, you get points to download 3 songs of your choice and I have downloaded songs that inspire me and change my mood. I have learned now to embrace my cycle and embrace my feelings and now its very managable..Thank You Jesus!

I just came out of my PMS for this month! And was having a discussion with my husband this morning on how I still can't get over how different my perspective is during that time. I was like, look at me know, all happy and giddy and light, but just last week, I was overwhelmed at everything and all over the place. I know God wants to teach me something too, because it's not going anywhere anytime soon. I've always had irregular periods, so I never knew when I was in or out or what was happening. After having children, I've started having them monthly but on different days. I can narrow it down a little, and it seems to go on for at least a good 2 weeks before I come on. When it's over I'm like a new woman. I can think clearly and can take on a mountain, but when it's here, I can't concentrate, I'm highly irritable, emotional, the works. I don't like to have to make decisions during that time, but without fail it is as if the devil breaks out his biggest guns and everything comes up during this time. I truly have to stay close, prayerful and diligent in the battle during this time of month. Thanks so much for this wonderful article and to everyone who has commented. It always helps to hear that we're not alone and can even laugh because we're all so much a like!

I too have those same mood changing problems, crying over little things and stressing over things I know I shouldn't be. I too always use the excuse that I am PMSing and I am sure my husband and family get so tired of hearing it. I get so bad that I would hate to be around myself. Reading your story has truely opened my eyes to what should be a blessing in my life. I pray that as I get ready to have my period for this month that I will keep this story in my mind and remember to pray for more control over my emotions. Thank You for sharing this with all of us and to the rest of the ladies thanks for your stories and moments as we are all only human and so much alike. God Bless, Bonnie

Menstruation is also an interesting topic for a Bible discussion, it illustrates how we have to allow enlightenment into faith. In the Jewish tradition menstruation was seen as 'tuma' which is interpreted 'unclean' in Leviticus 12 but refers to loss of spirituality, traditionally re-established with a ritual cleansing. These concepts can lead to terrible prejudice, such as having a female baby leaves a woman unclean twicefold, and support masogynistic values and cultures. Rituals can be rather cruel, Jesus said of his ( Jewish ) people: Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition...in vain they do worship me, teaching doctrinal commandments of men ( Matthew 15 )

Thank you Andrea. I don't have a period anymore and I have never experienced PMS but I sure don't miss my periods. I have not missed a single day of work in 9 years thanks to a hysterectomy. Took 7 years to make up my mind because of all the myths assosiated with it but one of the better decisions I ever made. The pain was brutal and nothing worked. Now I am 50 and I don't know which is worse the pain or the hot flashes. I really do agree with you that this whole perion thing has to do with what happened with Eve. I find that in all of this from puberty to menapause God is still good. He has allowed you to be candid and allow women to be able to open up about what we go through. Thank you and God Bless
Nida, Ontario

i have struggled with PMS all my life. In my youth, I had more physical symptoms. At 44, in perimenopause where women begin to get incredible hormone fluctuations, it has switched to more emotional symptoms. The worse right now is anxiety due to my cycles. For two weeks, I too, can climb mountains....for one and a half to two other weeks, I could barely traverse an ant hill! Seeking healthy answers, I suggest
considering reading 'Ageless' by Suzanne Sommers. We are chemical beings, and it is those chemicals which run our body, like gas does a car. Upset the chemicals and you can't function as well. Consider getting a hormone saliva or blood test, checking your adrenal glands function (your Dr can answer questions) and know that there are ways to manage the hormone mess. It may never be perfect, but with good nutrition, exercise, supplements and a BioIdentical Hormones, you CAN feel better. I am currently on a progesterone cream, extracted from a yam and natural testosterone because yes, even your sex drive starts to fall in your mid forties. We don't have to be as miserable any more. There are alternatives.